Show and Tell

We'd like to welcome Mari LaVell of Mari-flower to Adding Zest today.

I used to dread Show & Tell time at school. Do you remember that time? Where kids could bring their latest toy to school and show the cool things it does? Or they talk about the awesome vacations they took?

I had three strikes against me when Show & Tell started.
1) I was shy and didn’t talk much. (shocker, I know).
2) We were poor so, I never had anything cool to share.
3) I don’t have a third item but who ever says “two strikes”? Lame.

When I was in the third grade, I discovered the best Show & Tell item ever. We had just butchered several chickens, including a couple roosters. Somehow my brothers had figured out that if you stuck your fingers inside the throat of a beheaded rooster, you could find their vocal cords and give it a tug. The bodiless rooster could still crow. (sort of).

I found this fascinating. I smuggled the head into a brown paper bag and the next day when the teacher asked if anyone had Show & Tell, I eagerly raised my hand. Since I never participated in this, the teacher called on me first. I produced my new toy and proceeded to share the nifty new trick I had discovered. At recess time, I was the most popular kid (among the boys anyway) and my teacher called my mom to ask her if she knew what I brought for show & tell. She didn’t. Oh boy.

Being in my mid forties, I’m of that generation where many of our mothers didn’t prepare us for marriage. The act of marriage just sort of happened. The man part fits into the woman part, you make some sort of thrusting movements and after awhile voila`… you’ve had sex. Woohoo. Silence. Darkness…and… snoring.

No talking. No lights on. No clue what sex could really be.

Somewhere along the line, I decided that there had to be more. Or maybe it was simply that I craved more from it.

Now, I don’t like to over-spiritualize sex, but there is a verse that hints to me that God is okay with us enjoying it. Psalms 139:14(NKJV) says: “I will praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.”

Ladies, we are wonderfully made, yet we are fearful of how we are made sexually. We are afraid to explore how God made us because it seems dirty. We are fearful to talk to our husbands during sex to let them know what pleasures us because it seems awkward. Maybe we are fearful to enjoy the act of marriage simply because of ignorance and we don’t want to admit to anyone at this stage of life that we are.

When I used a thesaurus to check on the word fearfully, two options came up that clarify this phrase. The words; extremely and very, might clarify things. We need to take the fear out of this verse and replace it with: we are extremely and very wonderfully made.

I’m not suggesting you stick your fingers inside the throat of a dead rooster head, but I’m thinking there are things about how we are made that we don’t fully understand. It is okay to learn how your body functions and discover a nifty new trick.

My show and tell advice is simple. Our men are wired to be visual. Let ‘em see and watch as they enjoy you (and you enjoy him). And when something feels particularly wonderful, make sure you “tell” him.

Shed a little light, make a little noise…and viola, show and tell.

Mari is a middle-aged woman who thrives on her husband’s love, mixed with generous portions of good chocolate and daily lattes. She serves beside her husband as they pastor a small church in the mountain community nestled among the Cascade foothills in Washington.

Married for 27 years, she has three adult children, two of which are married. While she never liked the title of mother-in-law, she’d rather just be Mom. Mari does enjoy the new season of life called Gramma-in-luv. With five grandchildren, ages three and under, Mari feels she taught her children the concept of loving their spouses quite well.

In the past year, Mari began to pursue a long hidden desire to write. She is considered a “freelance author”. In other words, so far she writes for free and personal enjoyment. If she can get her ADD, middle-aged, menopausal mind to focus once in awhile, she may actually accomplish something.

You can find more of her written works at her blog, Mari-flower.