The Bare Truth of Bodies

When was the last time you looked in a full length mirror and groaned? Or do you simply avoid those evil things at all costs? From there you might plot ways to change your clothes without your husbands having to see all your imperfections and added weight or body changes. But you know what? That's not giving your husband enough credit. Chances are that he didn't marry you for your luscious body. Granted, he probably couldn't wait to get his hands on you, but he had more reasons to marry you than just your looks...even if you were a hot babe. It wasn't just your body that he liked, that was simply in addition to all those other components that make you who you are. Your eyes, smile, laugh, personality—your inner person.

So why do we think that our husbands only see our bodies now? Because it's a lie that is sugar coated and spoon fed to us every time we turn around—and as wives and mothers we do a lot of turning around.

When we feel like a lump of play-doh it's hard to feel attractive to our husbands, let alone feel sexy.

What are we to do we do when we feel like play-doh?
Forget society and focus on being pleasing to only one man: your husband. What does he like about you? Sure you can ask him, but chances are he drops hints without realizing it. Watch his responses to you at different times. What puts that sparkle in his eye that says he can't wait to get his hands on you? Is it your sense of humor or laughter? How about a look you give him? Or doing something special for him? Experiment and notice his reactions.

Take a look at what Andrew Greeley, author of Sexual Intimacy, says about sexy...
To be sexy is to be aware of your body as an instrument of playfulness and delight, to be able to communicate this awareness to your husband and give him the gift of your body for pleasure, delight, variety, and playfulness.

Did you catch that being sexy is not linked to how your body looks? Read that definition again if you need to—it's worth it! Sexiness is our attitude. And we can choose the attitude we have! Sure, that choice may be a knock-down-drag-out fight at times, but we are still the ones in control of it.

If you're in the midst of one of those all-out fights with your attitude, remember that you don't have to fight alone. We have an all-powerful God just waiting to fight for us. Run to Him, pour it all out before Him and ask Him to help you to have a sexy attitude. God can do that! He gave us sex as a gift to enjoy, and He knows how our minds need to be in order to enjoy it. Go to God and ask Him to give you a sexy attitude. It's a gift for both you and your husband.

When you have this attitude, you can be a sensuous lover to your husband—and that's the key: sensuous. Here's what Linda Dillow and Lorraine Pintus had to say about this in their great book Intimate Issues:
"It's better to be sensuous than to have a perfect “10” body. Delighting your husband with your breasts and giving him ecstasy (Proverbs 5:19), swaying your hips seductively and displaying your body before him (Song of Solomon 6:13-7:9) will cause him to revel in the joy of your body. It it God's gift to him. Your body is for him!”

The truth is that it's not how we look, it's how we act and our attitude behind it. So go ahead and bare your body and let your inner person shine! Show your husband your love and use your body creatively and playfully to give you and your husband pleasure.